For all of you older fathers who already "know" everything about fatherhood I want you to know that in this post I do not claim to know everything about being a father. The intent of this post is simply to explain some of the things that I have observed the past week concerning my new role as a father.
The first thing is regarding money, and my son. I think before I was a father I thought that it might bother me, all of the money this son would cost me. I thought at least I might be more aware of the new expenditures he caused. The reality of the matter is that neither does it bother me nor am I completely aware of the money I spend. I think it is best stated by saying that when I am hungry, or when I want a new toy, or have any supposed need, I go get it for myself. In the case of Brogan, my subconscious mind interprets his needs as my own in a completely altruistic manner. I therefore strive to fulfill his needs without any forethought of the fact that his needs in truth, are not mine. I first discovered this Fatherly aspect yesterday when I bought a swing for him. It was only $20 but we have been diligently trying to cut down spending so $20 is a lot for us right now. I am grateful for this ability I have for this certain ignorance.
The second thing I noticed today when Brogan rolled over. Whenever we set him down in the living room I always have to lay next to him and block him from the air conditioner. As I lay next to him, intently I watch as he struggles to roll himself over. Today as he was verging on getting from his stomach onto his back, the urge for me to help him "go the distance," (I just watched "Rocky" this week), was incredible. The difficulty I had in watching him struggle could never have been anticipated. As he lay crying and struggling to get on his back I feel as though I am being a good father, letting him do it on his own. Having an active role (or in this case, an inactive role), with helping my children do things for themselves is something I have looked forward to, and awaited some time. My hope is that I have the strength to stand back and watch them struggle, all the while encouraging, and advising the best I can; Of course, should they fail or fall, I will always be near to catch them and help them back on their feet.
--Jason
1 week ago
2 comments:
Jason- you're a stud! I'm sure you're the best father in the world so far, and I'm sure Lorisa is so proud of you.
PLus- you're such a great writer! You both need to post more ofteN!
Any man who might claim to know everything about fatherhood obviously is not a great father. One of the best aspects about being a dad is learning something new everyday about your child and from your child.
My first son will be 3 in a couple of weeks and we are expecting another boy Aug 28th. There were too many moments to count where I wanted to jump in help him when he was struggling; however, there are evern more times now where he just wants to figure it out on his own. I believe that encouraging him to be persistent & patient as he learned new skills was what helped him to be so advanced and indipendent now.
Being a father is the greatest joy in life. When he is a baby it is tough, but fatherhood gets easier & evern better as he grows!
Check out www.HappyManOnline.com and sign up for the free weekly e-newsletter, you'll enjoy!
ps-love the name Brogan!
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